Today, all of a sudden my GF called me to share one of the scandalous messages “Darling, we cant be together anymore” I was totally dumfounded that gave me sudden jerk. Well, it’s been a long relationship for about almost 2 years. Honestly speaking, at the outset, I took it as a fun affiliation; on the contrary, she was utterly drenched with my love.

slowly but surely, I just took it for granted and met her when I needed. On the other hand, she used to call 10 times a day and sending countless messages which I hardly replied with real curiosity. Lucky, I was to be her first Boy Friend. Though we live in same city we meet hardly once or twice a week all because of my hectic schedule and some other things. She had always time for me, yes always.

Whenever, we met she strike a chord me how much she loves and how her life has been complete after my ingress. “Honey, You are my Prince” She whispered many times kissing me tightly. After few 5-6 months I got jaded with her as I really did not like her as a Girl Friend, she was different, unique, tall, blonde and average looking girl. But I do not know why she did not attract me that much.

However, things went on, I thought of ending relationship many times in between but I just assured myself “Man, there is nothing to lose”. During our relationship I spent few months abroad, and as traveling being my biggest passion, I made short trip around nearby countries though I always ran out of money. (Surprisingly, I never missed her in those trips, she mailed me everyday with everything she did from morning to evening). Bastard, I was, I did not carry even a postcard that barely costs a euro. She never grumbled anything, all she needed was me and my company and love.

Then finally, I had to go to another continent for my study purpose for one semester “I unofficially ended the relationship from my side and finally excused her for not being so loyal to her, I admitted I could have been a better boy friend. At that time, I felt sorry for her and all the troubles I poured upon her.

To my surprise she wrote me Next day “Man, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me. I want you to know you haven't treated me badly, ever, even though you seem to think so. You have always been so good to me, and I really mean always. But now it's time for you to leave for other country. And it's time to decide whether or not we'll continue together. I already said to you what I want. You, you, you. That is what I want. And I want it so badly. I hope and in a way I know that we'll continue this love story (don't mind the clichés I use all the time). Boy it's a long way, but why should it stop us? We love each other more than anything, more than we can say. I want you to be open with me, don't hold anything back. Tell me everything you want and feel and love and hate. “Then she added “I wanna share my stupid stuff with you, even the most stupid things I wanna tell you. I am ready to go through this long separation. Are you?”

Then after spending a semester I again came back and she was there to welcome me with open arms. My feelings were same for her. We met like before and so on and on. Slowly I started loving her, I wanted to spend more time with her….I enjoyed being with her….which obviously she liked a lot.

And suddenly she said she can’t be with me anymore coz she thought we r totally different and she is still puzzled if I am right person for her. When she divulged this yesterday I realized how much I liked her, I was about to burst into tears. I never expected such bitter news from her. I know it’s my entire fault not to take it seriously, similarly I am damn sure not to stay in that country for long where she wd love to spend her whole life, Marriage was not in our card (Neither mine nor her).

If so, why I am so much worried now? Is it ego problem or a MAN thing? Today I wrote her a very long email (perhaps the longest) and we exchanged 20 SMSs. It seems she had absolutely determined to walk away from my life. I started feeling her absence right from that moment and I am begging for her love now. Never in my wildest imagination, I thought I would do that but I am dying to meet her now and to express everything. But she kept on repeating, we r very different to each other, she had seen me long and its time we drive different lanes. But she is still in dilemma and , she had not yet revealed we wr BROKEN UP. Then we r meeting finally to decide about this thing and spending a night together in her apartment, that could be the last night or …..I do not know…..I still have chance….Dear friend,s please tell me what should I do??????

Is it only my EGO that does not allow her to go or is this real love? I cant figure out anything.., I’m also not certain if I can change her mind….or Should I let her go her own away, time will heal everything, what I should I say…..how should we act?? I don’t know….what will happen if we re established our relationship? Can I change myself? I have no IDEA friends………………Im just f’*** up but one thing is sure I LOVE HER.

(She is 20 years, European, a college student, better looking than me with European Standard height)

Just now I wrote her SMS

My princess, I will love you till the end of time
Every breath of mine I'll hold you by my side

But I'll rest in peace my sweetheart would you
Let me die in your arms with you-

Aaj Pooja, Kal 'Dooja' kinda....: LooteKukur

Loots bro, IS IT DIALOGUE FROM dil chahata hai?

Nepe Daji and all the frens thank U all for your great support. Will wriet u back after a while...

Dear friends, I have opend up myself like a OPEN BOOK here in SAJHA, Don know its a good or bad. Today we r meeting for final (?) time but I just got this mail from her. 14th March' 2007 goin to be really impt day for me. I dont know what shd I do....waitin for more suggestions. Im really thankful for your suggestions and concern.

-------Here is the mail-------

Hi Darling, You broke my heart with that mail and my eyes are full of tears now. Could you please tell me if you really meant all that you wrote? Because I'm afraid of what you might do to yourself or me.

I want you to understand that my feelings are not mixed and I have hidden insecurity about you that I've been trying not to remember or think. I've always thought we're an odd couple, somehow totally different. But it's almost all the time been only a good thing to be so different. Just sometimes there are times when you don't understand me at all, when you just hear me but don't really listen to what I try to say.


This is life. You have to learn to live even with your heart broken, like I did. Someone once said in one show that it is more awful to be the one who leaves people, not the one whose heart gets broken. You broke my heart when you left for another country, so I know how that feels too. But seriously, it is even worse to be the one who leaves. There has always been something that doesn't work in our relationship. And that is the lack of understanding. It feels like most of the time I don't understand YOUR nature, I don't understand how you function and think. And then again, you don't understand me, despite all these I loved you so much. For the first few months of our relationship it was just getting to know one another, and in a way it still is like that. But at that time it was easier to ignore the differences and misunderstandings. I'm not saying that you being so different than me is the reason for all this. But there just isn't mutual understanding on many things.

Anyway, after a year when we knew each other better it kind of started to bother that I never laughed at something "funny" you said or you never understood why I cried. And to be honest, You never tried to understand what I mean.

I've tried to keep going like this and to ignore the fact that I'm actually not the right one for you. I can imagine a girl that would suit you better: someone who laughs a lot, who understands your jokes and everything you say and mean and also understands what you mean by being quiet or leaving something unsaid. Someone who can really love you the way you are and doesn't try to fix or change you anyhow. I think I don't love you now the same passionate way I did in initial stage. But I love you in my own way. And I'm sorry that it has taken me a long long long time to realise these things. I've wasted your time and this is the result, this is what I give you in return. Doesn't that tell you anything? Doesn't that tell you that if I loved you as much as before I wouldn't do those things to you?

Still, my Himalaya, my Mt Everest I am not sure what I want exactly. I know that these lies must end right now. I can't lie to you and most of all I can't lie to myself because I am the one who I have to live with all my life. I'm responsible for myself and I don't want to hurt myself by being with a person that doesn't suit me at all. People, friends, boyfriends and girlfriends come and go and none of them are people you couldn't live without. Of course it is true that all those people make your life a lot more fun, interesting, deep and precious and worth living but one can survive without them too. This is exactly what you a while ago said to me.

You said that you could also live without me, that at first it would naturally hurt and be so difficult but after a while things would get easier. You actually said you can live without me, do u still remember the day when we watched the movie WALK THE LINE?. Then why do yo speak now, when it is all coming to an end, as if you would die without me?
Tell me. I want you to answer that question. Why do you think you can't live without me? Or do you think so? I want you to say that you won't harm yourself. Because after all I care about you so much. I love you my dear and right now it doesn't matter how I love you, as a friend or as a boyfriend.


We both are still so young. We've got so much life ahead of us, or at least that it what can be assumed. I'm sure we both will reminisce this after 30 years and smile at us being all so serious and forgetting to have fun and live our lives independently. My Boy, you are NOT dependent on me. You are not dependent on anyone. You're so strong. And you have such a good attitude on life. I love you for being so kind and trying to do your best for me. I love your nature, thought I do not understand it so well. I love you being so happy and funny. And I hope that even without me in your life you can still be happy and you can find someone new. You are my first boyfriend. And I'm your third or fourth girlfriend, or that is what you have told me. There are a lot of people for both us to know, to experience life with them.


Can you please explain me why, IF we now break up, WHY you don't want to keep in touch with me if we're not a couple? Why don't you want to keep me as a friend? Because I would like to keep you in my life even after this. One good thing that may come out of this possible break-up is that now you can go wherever you like. You don't have a reason to stay in this small boring town which you don't love. You can travel and meet new people. You can move wherever you like or abroad somewhere. I never wanted to restrain you, I never wanted to keep you doing all the things you love. But I think YOU yourself have partially restrained yourself from doing these things maybe because you've been afraid of hurting me.

I love you my darling but I'm not the right one for you.

The girl who lost her mind and LOVED you like a MAD

-s-

--------I TOOK HER PERMISSION TO PUBLISH the MAIL, as i told few dasy back I was sharing our stoyr in one forum..SHE WANTS HER NAME TO BE KEPT SECRET--

---(She has no idea about SAJHA.COM)

"my himalaya My mt. everest" what? are u making this up dude? she calls you "tom"? I think ur making something up to get attention or u want to imagine something that will produce big response from audience (like making preview of movie). if it is true... sorry.. just feel it's getting out of hand...if not true..hey nice imagination..

dude you should o to blowmeuptom.com and listen to what the prophet has to say

MR TRUTH said
I think ur making something up to get attention or u want to imagine something that will produce big response from audience--

ONe of my frens said, its not good to share your personal problems here in Sajha, everyone wil make fun out of it and u get no solution. I wish I would have listned him. I thought it was right platform to express your suffocations...

Mr TRUTH,
I hope u ve got my mail

Jai Nepal
Jhilke bro, do not worry. Soon, you will be adjusted. I also had a similar incident.
I am not against women but there are some famous articles and quotes.

"Esteeriya (Lady) Charitraya purosh (Gentle man) ta vagyam daivo na jane kuto manusyam"

"Dhol(drum), pasu (animal) aur nari, kutan (beat) ke adhikari (deserve"

Sorry, no offence to any women.

Jai Nepal

Her: An emotional girl who tried to work things out with you.

You: Somebody who didn’t appreciate what he had, until he lost it.

Course of action: Your best bet is to start over.


The girl clearly has lost the love she had for you. If you impose yourself to her, beg her to take you back then it will make things worse. There is a difference between Daya and Maya.
I’d suggest you to take the break up calmly, but don’t give up…yet. I’d like to ask you to forget her, but I know how hard that’d be. So, my friend, accept the “break,” but know that you will be trying again. She already is inviting you to be her friend; be that..be just that. Help her on her stuff, you know her, help her on things she would need help (don’t just show up to her door every day). Help her as a true friend. Then slowly make her realize you have changed and you realized how you have treated her in the past. Slowly and slowly work your way back.
If she is in love with somebody else, then it is never meant to be. This gradual “break-up” (break up with hope) would help you absorb the impact of the finished relationship. If not, you always have an “insider” chance of getting her back.

i think dwi is right about this. You didn't care when you had the chance and now you do care but this could be just because you're losing someone. anyway...even if she gave you a chance...it would be starting over in a way because she feels that you don't understand her. But i think she wants to keep you as a fren forever...which you could do in order to help her not feel like she is totally losing you. If you can't then u can't ..but it's selfish i think. LOL that's just my thinking i could be totally wrong coz sometimes it's better to get over a person when you don't see them anymore. But then it does hurt a lot
anyway..good luck

Hi Amazing,

Her email clearly said that she has no affection to you as a "soul mate" so I agree here with DWI and again I would like to say let her go. However no need to beg for your love. Again as DWI said there is a difference bewteen Pity and Love. Calm yourself and hold your tears. You pretty much aware of what she thinks about you and this relationship. Do something that would not ruin your few moments that you are going to share with her. I said on the last post; This may be the last chance to show that you care and respect her existence.

You love her; in that case there is no need to loose your self dignity but don't be an arrogant.

Keep the friendship. Think you may have several other true friends but she is the one who truly knows you from inside-out. If I were you I would not loose her as a friend.

My best regards. Enjoy life there is lot more to come.

Something to read:

Many people will walk in and out of your life,
but only true friends leave footprints in your heart.
To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart.
Anger is only one letter short of danger.
If someone betrays you once, it is his fault;
if he betrays you twice, it is your fault.
Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events;
small minds discuss people. He who loses money, loses much;
he who loses a friend, loses much more; he who loses faith, loses all.
Beautiful young people are accidents of nature,
but beautiful old people are works of art.
Learn from the mistakes of others.
You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself.
Friends, you and me. . . you brought another friend. . .
and then there were three. . .
we started our group. . .
our circle of friends. . .
and like that circle. . .
there is no beginning or end. . .
yesterday is history.
Tomorrow is a mystery.
Today is a gift.
That is why they call it the present.
------Eleanor Roosevelt

WoF

this story is so familiar-classic breakup with its bullshit rationales...I always did it when I found someone new. you can always find defects on even the best relationships if you want to fly the coop. I know I sound rotten, but I also have a sneaking suspicion I am not the only one.
I still am not convinced this is a true story though. or maybe the premise is, with girl dumping boy, but the layout just did not do it for me. too much masala in the tarkari, if you know what I mean.

Dear friends, she just sent me SMS, she is coming here soon. Oh My God.......whts happening....My heart never beats this fater....I see whole world moving faster n faster...

I cant see wots goin on around....

See ya later guys...thanks a lot for all your kind support....After going through all the replies and suggestions from all of you, Im just goin to act normal (thouh hard) still i will express what she meant to me but I will RESPECT her decision. if she permits i will post some of our pictures.......(Aba SAJHA ma lukanune kura nai k bhayo ra--------I will never come in SAJAH after this, If I do, I will change my nick)

Love u guys...

Outside, I'm masquerading
Inside, my hope is fading
Just a clown, that is dear
My smile is my make-up I wear.

Amazing,

Well, neither I am an expert nor I have been through any of these situations. But I have many friends from North ( I presume she is from North).
We cannot generalize all the people of North but from my experience so far I can say this ...like the climate they are cold and isolated. They live individualistic life. I have heard that divorce and suicide rate is really high in this region, may be because of this.

Yeah, love can happen anywhere and with anyone. But when one of the two falls out of it , it is better to move on with life rather than trying to work on it again. Love is very delicate when it comes to breaking up while it is very strong when one falls into it. So I suggest let it be. Let her go her own way. Even if she stays this time, this is not gonna last long. So why prolong the tragedy. Face it now!.

One of my very close friend is living with a boy since last three years. But every time she has only one thing to say "We are different". And guess what she thinks , they are different because he loves to stay inside in weekends and she loves to go out.... Funny no? For them even these minor things matter. Once they find someone they will leave each other. Do you want that kind of relationship?
So culture plays a big role I guess. Get someone who has different values and definitions for relationships.

This is definitely not your first love. Besides, I don't think you ever loved her. And mind you she is just 20. What you expect from a 20 yr old blond ( no offense)? She has still got to explore a lot in her life. Not like us Nepalese where a girl becomes a mother at this age. You are definitely not her FULL STOP, may be one of the semicolons or just a mere comma in her life.

On a funny note: No worries and cheer up! April is just round the corner. And Spring celebration is approaching soon in north. So there will be lots of drunk blond butterflies around if in case you need a time pass.
Tum Nahi Aur Sahi Aur Nahi koi Aur Sahi

Whatever Amazing… “ Just listen to your heart , shut down your brain system for a while.. go get her ”

Good luck!

Cleopatra: I have heard that divorce and suicide rate is really high in this region, may be because of this.

Absolutely Cleopatra, people suicide here in small reason or for no reason.Life is so different here

-----
Talk to u later, im getting late..........see ya soon guys

lycka till, Amazing!

It takes a lot of work to have a great relationship yet it could turn out being perfect but perhaps not the perfect that you thought perfect meant or would be.

Also, never take things for granted and especially never take anyone for GRANTED, it is absolutely NO NO, if you do you will regret like it.

Just let her go, move on..life is too short waste on things you cannot change....

it's arlright ddue. mine marirried to anothre guy when she moved to LA,CA. she thinks she is great after getting GC.
don't dispare cauze you can get othrre girls. lot of girls in Nepal will die for us especially from USA.

don't worri too much.

She is GONE...................

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Amazing, Sometime a gift of goodbuy can be the best gift.

all i want to say to this dude iz get over it and carry on with your life/ dont see no biggie in here/ people fall in love/ people have their heart broken.....unfortunately this time its you..but this is how the world is...gotta live with it....rest is your call...peace